Thursday, March 26, 2009

Breaking Dawn-My thoughts

I started reading the Twilight series after seeing it mentioned on several gossip sites. I've always loved vampire and supernatural books and movies. My first Vampire book was The Vampire Diaries by LJ Smith. Smith is an amazing writer of the supernatural and young adult romance. I thought it would be something fun for me to read over the summer.
I bought Twilight and read it in about 2-3 days. It was okay. Not the best vampire book I'd ever read, but good for just a fun read. It was kind of like reading fan fiction, but I thought this is the author's first time writing, it will get better. There are more books in the series, New Moon, Eclipse and then Breaking Dawn. All of the books are about the same way. Bella is clumsy, thinks she is just average, kind of a snot to her dad and others who aren't the Cullens. Edward is beautiful, god-like, beautiful, has liquid topaz eyes, stalkerish, beautiful. Did I mention Edward is beautiful. Yes, almost every other page is Bella saying how beautiful he is.

I had already read some spoilers about Breaking Dawn, but I wanted to read it for myself to see if what I had read was true. I kept thinking there was just no way the author did that. No way she would go there. I was SOOOOO wrong people.

This book is completely different than the other 3. It almost feels like someone else wrote it. Or that the author didn't know how to tie up the loose ends, read some fan fiction about the characters, took the most insane and impossible one, and went with it.

It starts off with Bella whining about a gift Edward gave her. Some car that isn't even available in the States yet. She didn't want it. She's getting married in a few days and whines about that. Except that after they get married, Edward has agreed to change her to a vampire. Alice of course is planning the wedding. Here is where I started to get just slightly annoyed. The author can go into great detail telling us how beautiful Edward is, and just how plain Bella is, but the wedding is barely described. A bare description of Bella's wedding dress, bare description of the decorations. Just nothing.
Then they go off on the honeymoon. To the Isle of Esme. An island Carlisle had bought Esme. Here is where Edward and Bella consummate their relationship. We basically get .... our eyes met, our lips touched, hands touched.... fade to black. Wake up the next morning to pillows ripped to shreds and headboards busted.

I actually really didn't have a problem with this. I respect that there wasn't some long drawn out sex scene in a young adult book. But then here comes the shocker.... Bella begins to feel tired all the time and then hungry all the time..... What could be wrong.......

Then she feels something move around... and calls it her little nudger.... (Facepalm....quickest way to kill a book, introduce a main character being pregnant) This is especially weird seeing how the author told us in several books that vampires can't reproduce. And don't tell me because Edward was a virgin, he still had some junk. Nope, not gonna happen.

So they run back to the Cullen compound and the baby is developing at a rapid rate. Here is where all the characters in this series become paper dolls.... Bella calls Rose to protect her, becomes BFF with her. She uses Rose because she knows how much Rose always wanted a baby. Alice just goes and sits on the stairs, Jasper is just there, Edward looks conflicted, Carlisle doesn't know what to do while Bella wastes away. Then enters Jacob and the wolf pack.
Jacob tells Carlisle that Bella needs blood because the baby is a vampire hybrid. So instead of just giving her an IV with blood, Bella drinks gallons of blood. Plus this baby breaks her ribs and spine with its kicks.
I'll fast forward to the birthing.....
Bella vomits a fountain of blood all over the place, and goes into labor. Carlisle is gone. So Edward delivers the baby. He bites through her uterus to get the baby out. This is all described in graphic detail. Oh and Bella becomes a vampire also. And she bypasses all the bloodlust/newborn stage everyone else experienced. Why? I guess she is super special!
Then the name the child Reneesme Carlie. Renee and Esme names and then Charlie and Carlisle names. (Facepalm again)
Want even more creepiness. Jacob our werewolf/shapeshifter imprints on the BABY!!! ON THE BABY!!!
Of course the Italy vampires find out and you think a huge battle is going to happen.. Alice and Jasper run off during this.
The Cullens call in all of these other vampires from all over the world to bear witness who this baby is. And of course the baby is super special. She wins everyone over and ages at a fast rate. Goes from being a newborn to like a 3 year old in a matter of weeks. She can read, talk, hunt, yadda yadda...And during this we get more of Bella admiring how beautiful she is and more fade to black sex between her and Edward. And Charlie visits and turns into an ostrich who doesn't care and buries his head in the sand.

The Italy vampires show up and Bella uses her super duper love shield power and the Italy Vampires tuck tail and run back to their tunnels.

It was the perfect Disney ending. Bella gets her husband, baby, little cottage in the woods, and Jacob stays in her life by imprinting on her baby. And Edward calls Jacob son.

It really was as bad as people told me. I really hoped that the author would show growth in Bella. That she would grow a backbone, not whine and be such a lil twit towards people. But nope, she remained a Mary Sue character, nobody had to sacrifice or give up something. Nobody important died. There was no conflict. Just cotton candy rainbow colored unicorn farts.

If you do have daughters loving this series, I would not let them read this final book. Tell them to write their own ending.